Veneer

This isn’t what I wanted to write today —
I thought gardens and sunshine and light —
but you know as well as I that truth finds a way,
like water searching for its route.

I stare out from this shell
this broken exterior you see as whole
I bind myself in here daily,
held tight with coloured scarves and pearl-strands
I put on a good show —
you’d never guess, any of you,
just how deep the cracks
how close to breaking open this shell
until, pushed beyond unseen boundaries,
I do,
and then you see.

I don’t mean to test your mettle
but your responses reveal your true nature
either cementing how we move forward, together,
or leaving me broken on the floor.

 

It’s not all as dire as it sounds… but it has been a tough week, pressure-wise.

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11 thoughts on “Veneer

  1. This is so well put. Sorry that you’ve had a hard week. I am working really hard at setting some boundaries after going a bit off my rocker a couple weeks ago (or, as I have called it, claiming my own Independence Day!).

    • Boundaries are key – so important. Time for yourself and things that you simply won’t give up. Independence Day – I like that! Good for you 🙂

  2. Oh, I don’t know how I missed this. Blame it on my WordPress reader.
    But now I’m here, and maybe this is just what I needed to see today. That first stanza and

    I bind myself in here daily,
    held tight with coloured scarves and pearl-strands

    are big yeses. And hugs and thanks. xo

  3. The sense of alienation is so palpable. Like Jennifer, I especially loved the line with the scarves and pearls. But those last two lines are powerful. We go together or I crack. Yep, been there. Hugs to you, sweetie.

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